When I was part of the Seattle Cosmic group, we had meetings that were an odd mix of private and public.  Private, because we met at someone’s home (a rotating series of hosts).  Public, however, because there were so many people.  40 people in one house suddenly turns private and cozy affairs into jostly ones, not unlike a coffee club that has suddenly decided that it should have its Saturday klatch in a lovely little bungalow.

Which is the problem, really.  I think large enough numbers of people in a private space can really give a private affair some of the good and bad attributes of a public one.  Good because you can interest people in games (heck, you’re all gamers); bad because there’s so many people that there isn’t a feeling of one on one cozyness and things can get so very messy if people aren’t careful.  People everywhere, sort of thing.  And elbow room can be an issue too, though less pronounced than in a real coffee shop, say.

I prefer small, private affairs.  Especially if they can be broken up by food (home-cooked pasta with something simple, or BBQ dogs, or a take-out buffet of India food.  I tend not to count Cheeto snackery in this category), although it’s not necessary.  A lot more relaxed for me.

(Oddly enough, BGG.CON was a small convention, although it wasn’t that small---200-some people.  But it still felt nice and cozy for some reason....)

I am also curious as to what your jambalaya tastes like, now…

I host 30 public gaming events a year (Atlanta Game Fests, Games Day Atlanta and twice a month events at a local pizza place called the Atlanta Boardgame Meetup Group, organized through meetup.com), but I also have been playing in the game game group on Thursdays for just over 20 years. The Thursday group is limited to 6 and the only way we’ll bring in another person is if somebody leaves the group.

On a pure gaming level my private groups are probably the best. The quality of gaming probably isn’t as good at the public events. There are more distractions and the level of opponants, at least their experience level, will be lower. I tent to play lighter games at the meetup.com events but, that said, at our last event, a new person arrived late at and the only game that was starting up was Puerto Rico and the newbie played well. Public events have not only grown the boardgaming hobby in Atlanta but have increased my social circle as well.

The public events are, in my mind, more social and an opportunity to grow the hobby. The private events strengthen indiviual friendships, are less formal and we can get in heavy and longer games.

I find both very rewarding in their own ways and would not want to give up either one.

I have two groups I host regularly. The first is in my home, weekly, and the second is in a Borders Bookstore Cafe, and we meet every-other-week. At home, we can play larger games, longer games, and we get a chance to play any game in my collection. At the cafe, we have a lower selection (whatever we brought) and usually limted space and some background noise.

I probably prefer playing at home, but I would never give up my public gaming. We have introduced many people to the idea of boardgames as a hobby, talking with them at length about or obsession. We also aren’t the scruffy RPG stereotype, so we bring a better face to gaming that what people might be expecting. We started with a core group of 5 gamers, and that has widened considerably and we now have 8-12 gamers for each session, most of them new to boardgaming.

Apart from that most of us don’t have homes which are large enough for the size of group we’d like to grow too, I think the contributions so far don’t fit my - and I know various other people’s - situation. In a hobby where we want to actively recruit people (and need to in order to have viable groups to counter natural wastage) we need to invite in strangers. Inviting a stranger into a public meeting (a pub is the natural setting here - and roll on the coming smoking ban) is acceptable, but publicising a private residence, and inviting unknown people in, is not what most of us want to do. So the public meeting becomes the public interface, where people are invited. Private gatherings can then be where people who’ve “passed” in some undefined way meet, in my case less often.

I was going to say that approach excludes other groups I play in, like me and a couple of friends from college, plus the family of one, which has been ruinning for over 20 years now. But then I realised no it didn’t, it’s just that the public meetings were as students. Similarly small conventions and other events make up filters. I have invited an unknown person to a group of friends, but although that worked ideally (we still play) I still wouldn’t make a habit of it, and it was still not a general invitation (it was inviting someone advertising in a gamers’ magazine - Sumo - to sell games in my town to join us).

And as for occupying space, believe me, our pub venue is very glad to have the custom (several drinks each) on a pretty dead Tuesday evening. I don’t think we’d be welcome on Friday night however. That is of course critical.

Oddly enough, my experience is usually the opposite:  I am always introducing people to games in my home, while my monday night cafe group is where I get the chance to meet for deeper games.

One other advantage to meeting in a public place:  you always know where you are going to meet, and there will always be people there, even if it is not always the same people.  There is no need for the host to contact everyone to make sure enough people come, or for those who have not attended in awhile to find out where it will be hosted or if the game night will even be taking place.

Jeff Allers writes:  Oddly enough, my experience is usually the opposite:  I am always introducing people to games in my home, while my monday night cafe group is where I get the chance to meet for deeper games.

One other advantage to meeting in a public place:  you always know where you are going to meet, and there will always be people there, even if it is not always the same people.  There is no need for the host to contact everyone to make sure enough people come, or for those who have not attended in awhile to find out where it will be hosted or if the game night will even be taking place.

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The key to meeting with any group, in my opinion, is a REGULAR schedule.  The Westbank Gamers met at my home EVERY week for 10 years.  There was no need to contact folks each week and remind them, or determine who was attending.  Everyone knew that if it was Wednesday, there would be gaming at my house that night.

I also regularly had folks I’d never met attend gaming at my house.  They were invited, either by me or by other Westbank Gamers.  No, complete strangers never did show up, as I or someone else in the group always had some sort of previous contact with them.

I think both venues can work well, and fully support them both.

A good point, Greg, about the regular schedule. When i decided to start hosting the group at Borders, the management there felt that every week was not a good idea and suggested every other week. Since that always leads to confusion (is this gaming week or not?) I chose to have games on the 1st, 3rd, and 5th Mondays, so people could always determine easily if it is gaming week. This has helped a lot.

Greg also makes a good point about not inviting total strangers.  We regularly have new people attend our DC Gamers sessions, which are always at people’s houses, but they always have been referred to us in some way.  They may be someone you met at a con, or through the internet, or referred to us by a common acquaintance.  I may be a poor proselytizer, but to be honest, those are the kinds of people I’d rather game with in any venue, including public ones.  That’s why I’ve always preferred the private settings.  I think the kind of minimal screening process that takes place greatly diminishes the possibility of unpleasant reactions.  Even with that, new members attend three sessions and then the group votes.  One negative vote is all that is needed for someone to be denied membership.  Such exclusion has happened very rarely, but it’s another safeguard we have to make sure everyone gets along as well as possible.