Scott Tepper: This Ain’t Your Momma’s Rock

I take it back.  Remember when I questioned the point of spending your time specializing in only one game?  I was wrong.  There is a very good reason:  Bucks.  Lots of them.  This past weekend was the USARPS Tournament finals in Las Vegas, with over 300 semi-finalists competing for the $50,000 top prize.

The game is referred to in some parts as Roshambo, but before you run out to find a player’s manual, my guess is that you are already acquainted with it under a more colloquial name: Rock, Paper, Scissors.  That’s right, there is a tournament where you can win more than the average US salary by playing a game that requires no equipment other than a single hand.

Who could have predicted that the game we played as kids to decide who would have to wash the dishes would become such a phenomenon?  Rock, Paper, Scissors has become so popular that organizations revolving around the game have sprung up all over the world.  The oldest is probably the World RPS Society, which was founded in London, England in 1842.  The USARPS League, the US counterpart, is similarly devoted to the advancement of Rock, Paper, Scissors, even to the point of petitioning to have the game added to the Olympics.

Like any pastime that has many devotees, RPS has developed its own sets of terms and lingo.  For example, a player who uses Rock three times in a row is said to have thrown an “Avalance”.  Throwing Paper followed by 2 Scissors is called “Paper Dolls”.  Three Papers in a row is referred to as the “Bureaucrat”.  A Paper thrown with a face-up palm is called a Subpoena for the cockiness of the thrower.

While some might think that this game is pure luck, a little searching will reveal that much has been written about different strategies and techniques that players can and do employ.  Serious competitors in the RPS circuit watch for “tells” in their opponents.  Little nuances, or habits can telegraph what a player is likely to play.  Many players rely on meta-strategies including trash talking in an attempt to shape their opponent’s throws.

Think you have what it takes to get in the competition next year?  That would be to have at least one hand.  The next step would be to compete in a local qualifying tournament.  In Chicago, for instance, there are sixteen.  To find the one nearest you, contact one of the local sponsors through the USRPS website.

You have 12 months now to get in…ummm…shape.  So in the meantime, here’s a little program from Stanford University to help you practice.  You might not make it to the big money finals, but who knows, it may help you get out of doing the dishes.

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