Frank Branham: Poland Has Gamers!!!!? Neuroshima Hex Review

Yes. Yes it does. Eric received a request to send a review copy of Neuroshima Hex. Eric apparently found it quite odd and immediately thought of me. So I got a box from Poland containing the divine Neuroshima Hex and the first issue of a magazine.

The magazine is the first issue of a gorgeous gaming magazine called Swiat Gier Planszowych. It is quite nice, being 80 pages mostly black and white, but with a very professional layout. They are review heavy and cover a mix of German games, Fantasy Flight (I'm thinking that they are doing Polish editions), and a tiny handful of original games from Polish companies and designers. Their reviews include a big number in the bottom right. (They gave GMT's Here I Stand a 9, but stiffed Twilight Struggle with a 7.)

As a mostly review mag—Bruno Faidutti has a guest editorial—they seem to be basing a bit of their format on videogame magazines: a couple of features, lots of reviews, and a review summary in the back giving multiple reviewer scores and capsule reviews to a single game. (If you do give scores for games, I like the trend that a couple of the videogame magazines have picked up for providing second opinions.)

The only Polish games reviewed are Lowcy Przygod (it gets a 4), Bonaparte (looks like a very wargamey 7), and Machina 2 (6-ish). There are ads for Neuroshima Hex and the wonderfully named Zombiaki II.

Zombiaki II appears to be a grid-based card game about zombies. That really does sound like a good thing. The name, of course, makes it seem like a long lost Uberplay game about Zombies migrating between tropical isles.

The rest is in Polish. Haven't a clue. I also haven't a clue about how you would get these games. Eric has suggested that the company who sent these is trying to set up a distribution agreement to sell these games outside Poland.

In which case, rush to order a copy of Neuroshima Hex.

The designer has only designed roleplaying games. De Profundis is an amazing RPG that involves writing letters back and forth to create a collaborative horror story. It is wonderfully evocative and perhaps suits Lovecraftian horror more than any other game ever made.

Neuroshima Hex is based on a roleplaying game (same author) set in a very typical post-apocalyptic world. You have a Terminator-like AI net, mutationally-challenged people, a giant carnivorous jungle (that's a little weird), and a Road Warrior-like landscape.

And the fight. This game is more about the fighting part. In 30 minutes.

The board is a tiny empty Settlers hex grid. Each player has a stack of 35 hex tiles. On a turn, you flip up three, discard one, then add the others to the board. The bulk are new warriors, and there are a few action tiles which allow you to move a warrior, kill an opposing warrior, or start a battle.

You see, the warriors do nothing but sit on the board taking up space until a battle starts. At that point, a LOT of stuff happens, and usually the majority of the stuff on the board dies. Each warrior has an initiative ranking from 0 to 3. The 3s all go first and attack at the same time. Then the 2s, the the 1s, then the 0s. Most shots are one hit, one kill.

The tiles also have arrows indicating the directions they strike. Several have multiple arrows (and are often the lower initiative tiles). Some can take more than one wound. Some cause more than one wound. Some attack the first enemy in the row. Some have shields that can soak a point of damage coming from a specific direction. Then there are nets that simply keep a piece from acting as long as the net is facing it.

There are also modules that increase the stats of adjacent friendly tiles, improving their initiative or soaking a hit, or giving them a ranged attack. Some pieces can move each turn for free or explode during battle to take out an area. Each player has a completely different set of tiles, themed after one of the Neuroshima races.

Each of these races plays very differently, from the basic heavy hitters to the team that can move around easily, to the team with all of the freaking nets. There is also a critter that can shoot through all enemy units in a line.

The actual object is to take out the opposing base, which requires 20 hits. A lot of the heavy hitters that do multiple points of damage can wear a base down quite quickly. And the four player game is played as partners, with the game ended by the first base to die.

Each turn makes you worry about a few things. It is hard to part with the tile you have to discard. Deciding whether or not to start a battle or to keep the all important battle tile is tricky. The big downside is that battle resolution requires paying a lot of attention to the details. You cannot progress too quickly, as the interactions can be quite complex.

If you play with the sort of person who has to try and run through the final outcome of a battle, your opponent may want to kill you. There is no luck involved save for the order that tiles come up in your stack. Could get painful if you were to try and determine the exact outcome of a battle. I can tell quickly if the outcome is to my advantage, but I've played with some folks who might spend forever trying to work it out.

Still, if the game bogs, you might lose a whole hour. The game evokes Legie, MtG (without the CCG baggage), a whiff of Revolution/Atlanteon, so it is basically a highly themed abstract where lots of things die in a short period of time. Pretty close to my dream game. The luck factor is a bit high. Battle Tiles are crucial, and nothing is worse than turning up a group of wimpy modules as your opponent turns up heavy hitters. (The game seems to last long enough that the tables will eventually turn, however.)

Watch this space when we figure out how the rest of you can acquire copies.
© 2007 Frank Branham

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Comments:

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Based on someone who got it recently, Neuroshima Hex can be ordered directly from Poland for under $40, including postage from http://www.rebel.pl/ Zombiaki is largely language independent and there is an English rules translation on BGG, so if you order Neuroshima Hex, why not also get a Polish zombie game? Posted by Jonathan Franklin on Jun 14, 2007 at 02:44 AM | #

Neuroshima Hex publisher (http://www.wydawnictwoportal.pl) will be attending the Essen Fair, so you can also grab a copy there. Posted by Artur Jedlinski on Jun 14, 2007 at 03:07 AM | #

Sounds like I may have to accompany my wife on her next Polish pottery shopping spree after all! As for the rest of the Polish gaming scene, it does seem to be up-and-coming.  Guntehr Cornett had a TV station at one of our gaming groups and a group of Polish game designers were there as well, demonstrating an abstract stratey game that I think Guenther’s Bambus publishing company is distributing (or will be?). There was also a representative from a Polish publishing company at last year’s Goettingen (I’m not sure if she was there this year, though). Posted by Jeff Allers on Jun 14, 2007 at 05:35 AM | #

Frank, is this going to make it to OOF?  I’m not really interested in actually playing it, but I’d like to take a gander at it at least.  Or maybe talk others into playing it first! D Posted by Dale Yu on Jun 14, 2007 at 09:17 AM | #

If so, I’m in as well. Posted by Jon Theys on Jun 14, 2007 at 11:09 AM | #

Oh, and thanks, Frank, for your consistently interesting and unique articles.  I think I’m gonna hafta order me some Polish games.  After all, I already have games in French, German, Italian, Czech, Korean, and Japanese. Posted by Jon Theys on Jun 14, 2007 at 11:15 AM | #

Be real. After touting a new, impossible to find game, not bringing it to the next con I attend would be criminal. Trotofant will be there as well. I got an email from the publisher of the game. They have yet to work out a distribution outside of Poland, and he recommends ordering the game from http://www.rebel.pl. He is also intending to send me a copy of Zombiaki, which in Polish means something like “Tiny Zombie”. If this is in fact the first game about Amazing Zuni Fetish Dolls, it could be the greatest theme ever. Posted by Frank Branham on Jun 14, 2007 at 11:18 AM | #

When I was in Poland with a tour group from my church in 2005, I kept an eye open for game stores, hoping to come back with an interesting gem. I saw stores, but I could never find an open one when I had unplanned time in the tour. Someday, I hope to go back on my own and then I will find a store that is open! Posted by David Reed on Jun 14, 2007 at 01:47 PM | #

I’m looking forward to playing this with you at the Oasis, Frank.  I hope it is as good as you claim! Posted by Greg Schloesser on Jun 14, 2007 at 02:08 PM | #

Frank - Thanks for another interesting article.  You’ve got me intrigued - now I’ve got to find a copies of these games! By the way, for those of you who can read Polish, there is what looks to be a very good Polish game news site at: http://www.gry-planszowe.pl/ - Rick Posted by Rick Thornquist on Jun 14, 2007 at 02:17 PM | #

I’ve just order a couple of copies courtesy of having a Polish colleague at work. She said “what is this kid’s website?” (She didn’t know about gaming) I corrected her and explained about the real world that we live in. Alan Posted by Alan How on Jun 14, 2007 at 03:04 PM | #

I don’t see why she needs correcting. I, personally, am 39 years old, going on 10. Moo, Frank Posted by Frank Branham on Jun 14, 2007 at 03:06 PM | #

I stand corrected. Alan (aged 4 3/4 on a good day) Posted by Alan How on Jun 14, 2007 at 03:33 PM | #

Frank Branham - Zombiaki is a game about b-class horror zombies trying to break the human defenses before the dawn comes. It’s pretty nice 2-player, strongly themed game (who doesn’t want to taste human flesh from time to time...). David Reed - I would not expect you finding any game store back in 2005. Currently the situation’s better - the market has grown rapidly for the last 2-3 years. Let me know if you’re going to be around some day, I’ll show you the stores :) Posted by Artur Jedlinski on Jun 14, 2007 at 03:48 PM | #

Glad for the good review.  I had this on my look-out list in April, but obviously couldn’t find a copy.  On it goes to the list of games to think about acquiring.  Anyone who can’t see we are in a golden age for gaming… well I don’t know what to tell you. Posted by Brian Leet on Jun 14, 2007 at 11:35 PM | #

Just to let everyone know, BGN will be giving away a copy of Neuroshima Hex in July. Just one copy, though—everyone else will have to order one! Posted by W. Eric Martin on Jun 14, 2007 at 11:48 PM | #

Artur - I actually saw a store in Krakow near the market square (if memory serves), but it was closed (I was there in the evening for dinner), and I was never able to get back to that part of town while I was still in the city. If I get back to Poland (and I truly hope that I do), I will take you up on your kind offer! Posted by David Reed on Jun 15, 2007 at 12:04 AM | #

My wife claims I never got past 5, though some of the games we play is definitely not for children ;-) Posted by HÃ¥kan König on Jun 18, 2007 at 04:33 AM | #

Your comments are on the front of the Zman games version, and they pushed me over the edge on buying this game because of the mixed reviews I have seen.  You should put an excerpt of this in your BGG comments so it shows up in my geekbuddy analysis. Posted by Mark Crane on Dec 6, 2008 at 12:58 PM | #