Matt Carlson: I shall taunt you a second time

I play games to have fun, and since I’m somewhat of an out-of-the-box sort of person I can occasionally get on the nerves of the more type-A players out there.  Occasionally, I find it advantageous to play this up, surreptitiously to get the upper hand but mostly because it amuses me.  During this busy holiday season, here are some entertaining ways to bother those OCD-leaning relatives.

The idea for this post came straight out of my physics class.  I use Monopoly (of all things) as a great example to explain conservation of momentum and conservation of energy.  Everyone is familiar with the game, and so I can talk about the money in the game moving between the players and the bank but the total cash in the game never changes.  In discussing this I always feel compelled to share my winning Monopoly strategy – always play as the Doggie riding in the Hat.

See, some of you have sat up on the edge of your seat and said to yourself – you can’t do that, you have to pick ONE piece.  To you I say, why not?  It’s not like you’re going to use all the little pieces in the box, who plays Monopoly with 6 (or more) different players?  If you insist on using the hat, I’d be more than happy to play the Doggie riding in the Racecar or, in a pinch, riding in the wheelbarrow.  If I’m feeling particularly combative I’ll pick the Doggie and have him wear the thimble as a sort of combat helmet.  The primary gain here is that I get far more enjoyment out of the game by playing with my own “custom” piece (it isn’t two pieces, it is a single “custom” piece, see…) however, I can occasionally use the situation to throw off some more straight-laced opponents as they become more frustrated with my choice of playing piece than with what I’m doing on the board.  The whole idea made me stop to think of other things I could do, or have done that might annoy a more straight-laced player but greatly increase my personal enjoyment of a game. 

With that in mind, here is a short list of ideas to try out against your next OCD/Type A opponent:

1)Play with a “custom” playing pawn.  Either combine available pawns (as in my Monopoly example) or just go all-out and grab something around the house that you enjoy as your playing piece.

2) Refuse to use your playing pieces as intended. Who says I have to place my cities right-side up?  I don’t see it anywhere in the rules.  If everyone else is standing up their meeples, have yours lying down.  Or, worse yet, have some of them lying down and others standing.

3) Don’t let order creep in. Why put your plastic trains exactly on the lines?  Let them wander a little bit (not enough to cause any confusion, we’re not trying to cheat here, just enjoy a bit of playfulness.) After all, in the ancient game of Go, the stones are supposed to be slightly larger than the space provided for them so they always have a bit of disorder to them, giving the board a much more organic look and feel.

4) Make a big production. No matter the game, there is always something you can treat with far more dignity and/or respect than it truly deserves.  Need to make a critical die roll?  Perhaps now is the time to break out your dice made out of semiprecious stones and warm them up before actually making your roll.

5) Personify your pieces. Your pieces are your friends.  Your strategy would be meaningless without them.  Let them know you care.  Have they not been performing for you as you want?  Maybe they need a little pep talk.  Grab one and set it in the zone of punishment as an example to all your other pieces, maybe the rest of them will get the drift and shape up and fly right.

6) Make inexact change. Playing with your spare roads, settlements, and cities is almost mandatory in Settlers.  But your money is also your property.  Why not collect as many small denominations as possible in order to have a huge pile and then cackle about being rich?  Alternatively, you could buy up all the 20’s and then pretend you’re the Don of a money laundering organization.  “I see you have come to me for use of a 20, very well you may have one but some day I may ask you for a favor…” The flip side is to be the first player to trade in for the largest denomination available.  Be sure to flash it around the table and surreptitiously drop it in front of you from time to time.  You may not have the most money, but you have the biggest one.

7) Take on a role You don’t have to play a role playing game just to do a little role playing.  I will occasionally run with whatever strategy I end up using and try to see how well I perform.  Am I pushing for discoveries in Age of Empires III?  Then perhaps I’m Columbus.  If I’m playing Bang!, I need to figure out my motivation.  Was my little brother just gunned down in town and I’m out for revenge or am I a John Wayne (or perhaps a John Wayne imposter) looking to clean up the town.  Speaking in a silly accent is worth bonus points.  (At least for a few turns, then it can get rather long in the tooth.) This can be particularly effective in games like Heroscape where each member of your team may have different personalities.  Maybe Chompy (what we’ve always called the Tyrannosaurus mount in the original set) is actually shy and simply mad that people have invaded his home.  Beware the independent country of Matt-Topia, we shall control all the ore on the island!

Now, a word of caution to anyone thinking that these ideas are great ways to try to get that little edge on an opponent.  You are playing a game, make it fun.  Nearly every suggestion above could be quite annoying in the right situation, the goal isn’t to make the game less fun for everyone else, it is to make it more fun for you.  I find adding in a bit of off-the-wall behavior helps prevent me from being too competitive.  I’m not trying to lose, but it will keep my attitude away from trying to grind any opponents into the ground.  It can also help alleviate stress if I feel like a game (or my opponents) are getting the best of me.  Rather than sulk, I can cheer myself up by regaining control of a portion of the game of my choice.  With all the family gaming coming up in the coming weeks, a bit of oddball humor can also put new gamers at ease to realize they’re supposed to be having fun and they don’t have to be all caught up in the drive to win or lose the game.  After all, in a four player game, there are still three people who didn’t win.  Some nongamers will look at that and see their odds of winning be very slim.  Helping them keep the game in perspective will go a long way towards a fun time for the entire group.

Have a great end of December.  I’m planning to see you in two weeks , but if that doesn’t happen see you next year.  My only non-BGN posting lately was my annual holiday boardgame guide that went up just after my last post.  Feel free to check it out and compare your favorites.  With family visiting soon I look forward to less boardgame writing and more boardgame playing in the near future.

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